Northern Illinois Counseling Associates, P.C.

A Tradition of Excellence

Home Staff Services FAQs Forms Contact Us

Marriage Rules/Wedding Rings

Marriage Rules©


By Dr. Larry B. Gelman


For many couples, there “ain’t gonna be no Christmas” this year!”  Not everybody is resourced or privileged with the opportunities of having loving and intact marriages, meaningful jobs, excellent health and the other “goodies”, or should I say, “fortunes”, of life.  Christmas is supposed to be a time of cheer, joy and celebration.  Religious preferences, notwithstanding, it is a symbolic “holy” day representing peace, hope, charity and love.


Hundreds of millions of dollars will be feverishly spent by millions of husbands and wives, commemorating the never-ending commercialism of the Christmas holiday season.  Liquid spirits will freely flow and “season’s greetings” will provide the ‘currency’ with which to embrace our loved ones and bid them our best wishes.


It is true, of course, that some couples will understand the real meaning and significance of Christmas.  They will know, deep in their minds, hearts and souls…through consistent and appropriate actionable deeds…that Christmas is really an every-day occurrence.


For the giving and receiving of “gifts” are understood by such couples as tangible extensions of the giving and receiving of those intangible qualities, within themselves, which are freely given to and graciously received by themselves, as well as to, and for, all others.


It is, perhaps, a sad commentary on contemporary living that some couples seem to be smitten by an almost contagious, insidious fatalism which permits transient emotional vulnerability in the sharing of commodities and salutations, only on one ‘special’ day designated for such sharing.  (So “gather round the mulberry bush” and sing a song of glee… and find the presents just for you…is there one for me?)


It is my belief, that to the extent we permit ourselves, to gift ourselves, to receive ourselves, those gifts we bring to bear, it is also the extent to which we can truly bear our gifts, to ourselves, and also to and for others. 


And when the experience of that moment occurs, especially within a marriage, moment-by-moment, day in and day out, the moment of that experience is what Christmas, I suspect, is all about!


Back to Top


Single Copy License Terms of Use

For a print version of the specific document on this webpage, you are welcome to click "Ain't Gonna Be No Christmas" subject to the following terms:


Before using, accessing, downloading, or copying and/or printing any pages on this website, please read NICA's Single Copy License Terms of Use.  


By using this Northern Illinois Counseling Associates, P.C. (NICA) website and its services, you acknowledge notification of the terms of service and attest to an understanding of, acceptance of, and agreement to all of its terms of service.


Copyright © 2012, 1998 NORTHERN ILLINOIS COUNSELING ASSOCIATES, P.C. (NICA). All Rights Reserved.

No portion of this document may be copied or used by anyone without the express written permission of the owner.



HomeStaff | Services | FAQs | Forms | Articles | Legal | Contact Us | Site Map



The material presented within this website is informational only and is not intended as a substitute for professional services and assistance. We have endeavored to present accurate information, but cannot guarantee that the information on these web pages is always current or correct. We do not assume responsibility for any consequences that may result from using this web page or any sites. We do not necessarily endorse or support the contents, claims, or representations of the websites we provide links to, in whole or in part. While we try to respond to inquiries, we are unable to offer professional advice via email. If you require urgent care, contact Northern Illinois Counseling Associates, P.C. (NICA) at 815-455-6736 or email us at [email protected] to schedule an appointment. If you require emergency care, contact 911 or go the emergency center of your local hospital.

© 2016 Northern Illinois Counseling Associates, P.C.  All rights reserved.